Hey there, beautiful soul! Today, let's dive deep into a topic close to every caregiver's heart: finding your secret sauce to conquer those pesky negative thoughts and reclaim your joy. As someone who's been on this journey myself, I get it. It's not always sunshine and rainbows, but trust me, there's a way to sprinkle a little magic into each day.

You know those moments when you're feeling on top of the world? Take a second to celebrate those. What's working? What have you been doing differently? Maybe it's a heart-to-heart chat with a friend, a quiet moment of journaling, or simply basking in the warmth of the sun during a brisk walk. Whatever it is, it's your own special blend of joy boosters.

But let's be real, there's no one-size-fits-all solution here. Oh, how I wish we could just get a prescription for happiness! But alas, life doesn't work that way. Instead, we have to rely on our own intuition, listening closely to the whispers of our body and mind.

Think of it as a grand experiment, my friend. What works for you might not work for someone else, and that's okay. It's all about exploring, experimenting, and taking note of what brings a sparkle to your eye.

I remember when I was in my late 40s and early 50s, diving into health and fitness. Running became my sanctuary, a place to clear my mind and nourish my soul. But then life threw me a curveball. Suddenly, my days were filled with caregiving duties, and running just wasn't feasible anymore. So, I had to pivot, to explore new avenues of self-care that fit into my new reality.

And let me tell you, those negative thoughts? They're like pesky mosquitoes, buzzing around, trying to steal your joy. But here's the secret: you have the power to swat them away. It starts with a moment of pause, a gentle inquiry into what's really going on.

Maybe it's a drive to clear your head, or a quiet moment on the patio with a cup of tea. Whatever it is, give yourself the gift of time to breathe, to journal, to...

You're in for a big treat with today's guest.  I chatted with a life coach and business friend who is passionate about self-care, self-love and the pursuit of growth.  

Today's guest, Amy Linsmeyer, is dedicated to helping women move forward in their personal and entrepreneur journey by encouraging dreams, their authentic self and developing a foundation that supports sustainable growth.   

Amy shared ways to put yourself first, finding a morning routine and most importantly taking action.   She gives her best tips and mindset practices, knowing that challenges are part of the caregiver life.  

Here are just a word from Amy worth noting:

• It's ok to let the pieces fall as you figure things out. 

• We need to know where we are, before we go where we’re going to go

•  It all comes down to what we want in life.   Appreciate the importance of your putting yourself first

• The difference between wanting and having is an action.  What are you doing to make it happen.   

• If you are not making the time you want to do, you basically are setting yourself up for failure.  

• Write down your mornings for 3 days first before you go to work/clock in
• You’ll start to notice times you can fit in
• Even if you only have 15 minutes - you can do journal gratitude.  
• If you can’t find a morning routine, then look at what you are doing in the evening

• If you want to show up for your Loved One, practice gratitude.   You will show up differently.  

• It’s even more important to adopt a Morning Routine and self-care.  

Have you said one of these statements?  

• “I feel so alone and isolated.”
• “I miss my friends”
• “I miss my spouse”
• “I would give anything to step back in time and enjoy the holidays of the past”
• “I feel so disconnected from everyone and everything”
• “ I am lonely and sad”

For caregivers, feelings isolated and lonely is a common complaint I hear and what I experienced quite often myself and a lot during the holidays.  You feel isolated and withdrawn from your family, friends and your daily routines.   You most likely had to replace time with caregiving duties or you stay behind from activities since your spouse can’t go.  

Some of my very dark, lonely days were 

• New Year’s Eve with my spouse going to bed at 8pm since he had his chemo treatment that day.  
• Working from home - I made the decision back in December of 2017 so that I could be closer to home 
• Declining weddings, dinners and special occasions knowing Denis wouldn’t be up to it. 
• and now add the 2020 pandemic to that mix.  

In a recent June 2020, National Center for Health article. 

• 43.7%, of caregivers reported moderate loneliness (almost half)
• 17.7% reported severe loneliness. 

In a AARP report 

• Overall 50% of caregivers were being diagnosed for depression. 

This can lead to a withdrawal from social activities and relationships that you previously enjoyed. You may also find that you’re literally facing isolation. 

I saw this in my Mom caring for my Dad back in 2017-2018.  She didn’t leave his side much and I was over 250 miles away.  The only interaction she had was by phone, an occasional visitor when my Dad was up to it and a quick run to the grocery store.   The nights were the hardest.

I am sure lonely feels are present for you too.  

So let’s...

Today I want to talk about Wilma.  Who is she?   She is that talk in your head that keeps you up at night.  She talks and raises your stress level.   She keeps distracting you.  She drives you crazy sometimes.  

I know you and I have Wilma in our head on occasion.   She is the worrier. 

This past week, I let Wilma the Worrier take control of me.   My husband, Denis wasn’t feeling well and had two occasions where he was nauseous, had stomach pain and fatigue.  If you haven’t hear about Denis, let me quick tell you his health journey.   He was diagnosed in 2017 with CLL (chronic lymphatic leukemia) and then int 2018 his cancer morphed into Hodgkins Lymphoma.   He is currently in remission but when he gets sick or has symptoms, we tend to get nervous.  

Like I said, I let my brain control me with the Wilma worry.  I laid in bed and couldn’t sleep with worry, I then started obsessing over Google and searching for symptoms and possible reasons for him not feeling well.  

I told myself that I had this mastered.  I worked really hard in 2018 to not let worry control me.  

Can you relate?  

Overwhelm and most specifically worry comes back when you least expect it.  

What I have learned is that you have to recognize it and come to the realization that you are doing it.  

Once I recognize it I have my own “go to plan”  

1.   Self Talk 

My self talk are those quiet times in the shower, when I am driving, working out, sitting alone. 

It’s my real talk.   That 25% of your brain that is positive, optimistic

2.  Journal

Get that notebook or journal and start writing things out.  I wrote out all the what if, the whys, then I don’t want to go back into a hard season.  I recommend you keep writing until you’ve  exhausted all...

How many of you laid in bed and wished that the world would just go away?   When I was growing up I remember that song…. Make the world go away,  (play)   I know I am aging myself.  

Yes it’s normal to feel like that on occasion.  But reality is, we have to get up and live our life.     

What does your day look like?

• A day of doctor appointments
• A day of chemotherapy or physical therapy
• Is your spouse having surgery today
• Is it staying home and taking care of your spouse
• Are you working?
• Are you trying to figure out how to get that appliance repaired
• Do you have to clean the house or do the laundry
• Grocery shopping
• Launching a new product in your business?

What is your mind saying this morning to you?   

• I am stressed
• I am anxious
• I am struggling 
• I am sad
• I am angry
• I am frustrated
• It’s ground hog’s day
• I am excited
• I am feeling joy

Our minds are incredibly powerful.    You can influence your mood each day.  

Your mind will welcome the easy way out like negativity (the downward) thoughts saying just go back to bed or stay in that sad mood.   It will tell you it’s ok and convince you of it..  

You'll have to work hard to get your mind to accept it’s positivity (upward) thoughts.  Sometimes it’s really really hard.   If I’m in a super duper downward spiral, I’ll tell my ind to take a hike.   “Hit the road jack and don’t you come back…..”  

Think of your mind as a muscle.  You will have to build that muscle to think upward especially in hard and challenging times.   If you want a 6 pack abs, you have to work at it.  

I am not saying you have to be happy or fake happy.  But you can find push through and find joy in your day.   You have a choice to wake up and make the best of the...

Navigating the holiday season as a caregiver can be a challenging experience. The pressures of maintaining traditions, meeting expectations, and ensuring the wellbeing of your loved ones can sometimes overshadow the joy and cheer that the holidays typically bring. However, it's important to remember that it's okay to feel overwhelmed, and there are ways to make the holiday season simpler and more enjoyable for both you and your loved ones.

In our latest podcast episode, we share personal stories and practical advice to help caregivers navigate through the holiday season. We understand the challenges and emotions that often arise during this time of year and offer strategies to manage holiday stress and embrace the present.

The episode begins by acknowledging the importance of validating your feelings. Whether you're feeling crabby, dreading the holidays, or experiencing a mixture of emotions, it's okay. Embrace these feelings and share them with close friends, other caregivers, or your loved ones. This acknowledgement of your emotions is the first step in simplifying your holiday season.

The pressure to make everything perfect and over-the-top can be overwhelming. However, letting go of this pressure can bring relief and simplicity. This might mean buying cookies instead of spending hours baking, or reducing the amount of decorations around your home. In this episode, we stress the importance of focusing on what's most important and finding ways to make things simpler.

Setting healthy and realistic boundaries is also a key aspect of managing holiday stress. This might mean saying 'no' to some activities or events to conserve your energy. This could also mean accepting help when offered, whether it's from family members, friends, or charitable organizations.

Creating new traditions and embracing the present is a vital part of managing holiday stress as a caregiver. The episode encourages caregivers to focus on quality over quantity, spending time with loved ones in a...