A light bulb moment happened between our my wedding anniversary celebration and today, that I want to share with you.  You know I'm all about sharing my challenges, struggles and experiences with you in hopes that it will help you.  As you are listening to this and you have more insights, definitely, DM me on Instagram @cathylynnvan or message me on on The Caregiver Cup Facebook Page.
  
Do you catch yourself saying  "if only"  statements? 

• If only things were different and my loved one wasn’t sick, I would do this.   
• If only cancer didn’t stick its nose into my damm life, I could do something fun.   
• If only I didn’t have to work and make sure we have health insurance. 

Is the “if only” syndrome robbing you of your happiness?   A bad case of the “if onlys” eats away at gratitude.   It makes us focus on the things we don’t have.  

This is...

Caregiving is a demanding journey, filled with emotional and mental challenges that can leave you feeling overwhelmed, stuck in a routine, or mentally drained. However, developing a strong mindset can significantly impact your well-being and resilience as a caregiver. In this post, we’ll explore two powerful mindset techniques—DSD (Do Something Different) and CCC (Catch, Cancel, Correct)—and how you can use them to find more joy, balance, and strength in your caregiving life.

Why Is Building Your Mindset Muscle Important as a Caregiver?

Caregiving requires not only physical endurance but mental strength. When your mindset is healthy, you’re better equipped to handle challenges with grace, bounce back from stressful situations, and maintain your own well-being while caring for others. Developing a strong mindset isn’t about ignoring difficulties or pretending that everything is okay—it’s about learning to navigate obstacles with...

Hey there, fellow caregivers! Today, I want to dive into a topic that hits close to home for many of us: caregiver motivation. It's those days when the alarm goes off, and we just can't seem to muster the energy to face the day. We're overwhelmed, exhausted, and wondering what happened to our spark.

In this blog post, we'll explore some insights from an article by Carer Card UK on caregiver motivation and share some reflection questions to help you assess your own motivation levels.

Understanding the Struggle

The folks at Carer Card UK shed light on the reasons behind caregiver demotivation, and it's something many of us can relate to:

1. Emotional Exhaustion: Caregiving takes a toll on our emotional well-being, leaving us feeling drained and depleted.
2. Overwhelming Responsibilities: Juggling multiple tasks and responsibilities can leave us feeling overwhelmed and demotivated.
3. Lack of Support: Feeling unsupported or isolated can exacerbate caregiver burnout.
4. Sacrifices and...

When my Dad passed in 2018, my Mom was left with all of Dad's belongings. Amidst the decisions of what to keep or give away, one precious gift stood out—his journals, over 40 years' worth, started in 1972. Evenings after sorting through belongings turned into shared moments of joy and tears as we read entries that captured a lifetime.

Inspired by Dad's dedication, I embarked on my own journaling journey. However, I soon faced challenges—finding time, understanding its importance, and staring at a blank page. My structured, disciplined nature clashed with the freeform approach.

Determined to unravel the benefits, I delved into the neuroscience of journaling. Structured journals became my allies, offering prompts that eased the process. Gratitude journaling emerged as a powerful tool, reshaping my mindset by focusing on positivity.

With a commitment to just five minutes daily, my journal became a sanctuary. Gratitude and wins intertwined, fostering a shift in my...

When something's bothering you, you know that getting your mind off of it is easier said than done.   In fact, research shows that when people are instructed not to think about a specific topic, it makes it even harder to get that topic out of their minds. But rehashing negative thoughts over and over in your head, also known as rumination, can be unpleasant and counterproductive

Negative thinking can contribute to problems such as anxiety, depression, stress, and low self-esteem. The key to changing your negative thoughts is to understand how you think now

One of the first steps toward changing your negative thinking patterns is understanding exactly how you think. This involves identifying any cognitive distortions you may be experiencing, which can lead to negative thoughts.  Meaning the  (faulty or unhelpful ways of thinking) 

 Negative thinking patterns:

• Jumping to conclusions: 
• Catastrophizing
• Overgeneralization
• Labeling
• "Should"...

One of the biggest things caregivers are good at is worry.   

• What if Dad doesn’t take is heart medicine?
• What if we can’t find a kidney donor for my husband?
• What if the CT scan shows growth?
• What if I can’t get refinancing for our home to a lower rate because my partner is not employed?

These concerns are legitimate and serious, but constant worry is stressful and will wear you down.  

Too much worry can create anxiety, stop you from the easiest of problem solving and can cause tension in relationships.

Are you an excessive worrier? Perhaps you unconsciously think that if you "worry enough," you can prevent bad things from happening.  But the fact is, worrying can affect the body in ways that may surprise you. When worrying becomes excessive, it can lead to feelings of high anxiety and even cause you to be physically ill.

But being completely worry-free is unrealistic.  What is realistic is taking steps to reduce and...

Toxic thinking can affect you more than you know. Negative thoughts rob you of joy and leave you hopeless for any positive outcome. 

Your pattern of thought influences the quality of your life (and your loved ones). Your thinking can also affect your health, sleep patterns, anxiety levels, and more.

When you recognize you're thinking toxic and it’s affecting your well-being, you can start practicing techniques to remove your toxic thoughts

How Toxic Is Your Thinking?
You declare your thoughts through words—sometimes in conversation with others and other times silently to yourself only. Whatever it may be, pay attention and listen to yourself. Do you find yourself saying these things to yourself or others?

• “I don’t have what it takes. I am not good enough.”
• “I am afraid that I will be______.”
• “I didn’t do it perfectly, so I’m a failure.”
• “What if I can’t finish in time?”
• “But I...