Today I want to talk about Wilma.  Who is she?   She is that talk in your head that keeps you up at night.  She talks and raises your stress level.   She keeps distracting you.  She drives you crazy sometimes.  

I know you and I have Wilma in our head on occasion.   She is the worrier. 

This past week, I let Wilma the Worrier take control of me.   My husband, Denis wasn’t feeling well and had two occasions where he was nauseous, had stomach pain and fatigue.  If you haven’t hear about Denis, let me quick tell you his health journey.   He was diagnosed in 2017 with CLL (chronic lymphatic leukemia) and then int 2018 his cancer morphed into Hodgkins Lymphoma.   He is currently in remission but when he gets sick or has symptoms, we tend to get nervous.  

Like I said, I let my brain control me with the Wilma worry.  I laid in bed and couldn’t sleep with worry, I then started obsessing over Google and searching for symptoms and possible reasons for him not feeling well.  

I told myself that I had this mastered.  I worked really hard in 2018 to not let worry control me.  

Can you relate?  

Overwhelm and most specifically worry comes back when you least expect it.  

What I have learned is that you have to recognize it and come to the realization that you are doing it.  

Once I recognize it I have my own “go to plan”  

1.   Self Talk 

My self talk are those quiet times in the shower, when I am driving, working out, sitting alone. 

It’s my real talk.   That 25% of your brain that is positive, optimistic

2.  Journal

Get that notebook or journal and start writing things out.  I wrote out all the what if, the whys, then I don’t want to go back into a hard season.  I recommend you keep writing until you’ve  exhausted all...

This may sound harsh and bold,  and I don’t mean it to be this way.   But when you look at the glass half empty , you'll continue to stay that way.   Complaining, moping and negativity are easy.  

Yes,  you are experiencing a terrible, challenging time.   I'm sending hugs and warm thoughts.   BUT,  let me be your best friend in your ear.   You have to pick yourself up!   Everything, I mean everything in your life isn't broken.  Yes, your spouse is sick, your new normal is hard but there are parts that are ok.  

Today I want to talk about making the best of EVERY situation.  

I'm hearing many complaining about the holidays not being good this year.   Yes, we're quarantining and being asked to stay home.  But, what about those ppl that lost their loved ones?  What about the people that lost their jobs and are losing their home?

Instead of saying and thinking negative.  Think:  No hustle and bustle, I don’t have to get dressed up.  I don’t have to travel.  We can stay in our pjs all day.   We can have dinner anytime we want to.   We can try new things.  We can Facetime our families.  

Same goes for you!  Instead of focusing on the challenges first , I encourage you to find joy & gratitude first.

Let’s do something fun.   I’ll  give you a couple situations we can find a piece of joy in it.   

 Your sump pump stopped working.  You walk down your basement and it’s flooded.  Four inches of water and everything is wet.  Your spouse just had knee surgery and can’t help.     Yes, this happened to me.  

• Silver Lining:  I was able to call for help and get my boys over and my mom helped.   It was amazing how we worked together and got the basement cleaned up and a new pump put in 
• I could have...

Caregiving can be a rewarding experience, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges, one of which is the constant worry and anxiety that caregivers often face. This is a topic we explore in depth in our latest podcast episode, "Redirecting Chronic and Obsessive Worry as a Caregiver."

Worry and anxiety are common among caregivers, often due to the uncertainty and unpredictability that come with caring for someone else's health and well-being. Whether it's concern about a loved one's prognosis, managing medical appointments, or simply the daily tasks of caregiving, these worries can easily consume us and take a toll on our mental health.

Understanding the difference between general worry and unhealthy worry is the first step towards managing this anxiety. General worry is a normal human emotion and can be helpful in some situations. However, when worry becomes obsessive, it can lead to anxiety and even physical symptoms, such as heart palpitations, stomach aches, or insomnia.

One of the strategies discussed in the episode for managing worry is recognizing and challenging our core beliefs. Often, these beliefs can fuel our anxiety and keep us stuck in a cycle of worry. For instance, some caregivers might believe that worrying shows they care, or that it can prevent bad outcomes. However, these beliefs are often unhelpful and can contribute to excessive worry.

Another strategy is to distract your brain when you find yourself consumed by worry. This could involve physical activity, like going for a walk, or mental distractions, like watching a favorite TV show or reading a book. It's about finding something that can take your mind off your worries, even if just for a short while.

Writing out your worries can also be an effective tool. It allows you to get your thoughts and fears out of your head and onto paper, where you can see them more clearly and challenge them more effectively.

One of the most important things to remember is that managing worry and anxiety...