Let me get real honest and raw with you today.  This podcast was hard to prepare for and it’s even harder to share.  This podcast is all about people pleasing.  Why you say - I am a people pleaser and I should really have my own club or group.  

Are you saying, Yes too.  Or are you saying No, I am not a people pleaser

Well, my friend, I have three quick statements before we begin.

• We all have people pleasing tendencies
• People pleasing isn’t all bad 
• But… people pleasing can lead to stress and burnout especially if you are a caregiver.  

Before we deep dive into this topic, I have something really excited to share with you! It’s a Quiz.  This one is very different.   It’s not one asking you what character you are or what color or animal you are…..  It’s truly about caregiving with very, very informative results.  It’s call What’s your Caregiver Style?  You can take this FREE quiz today by going to cathylvan.com or going to The Caregiver Cup on Facebook or @cathylynnvan on Instagram.  It takes less than 3 minutes and you will get very in-depth and informative results to help you think through your caregiver responsibilities.  

Let’s now dig into  People Pleasing.   

As a caregiver, Your Loved One is your top priority.   You open your heart, soul and energy to go beyond simple kindness to give to them everything they need and want.    

Pleasing might not sound all that bad.  After all, what’s wrong with loving and being nice to your Loved One and making them happy?  You do whatever it takes meaning you make sacrifices with little to no complaints.  

You go out of your way to do things for them based on what you assume they want and need.  You give up your time and energy.

The urge to please them can be rewarding to you, but...

There are two ways you become a caregiver:  

The first I call the creeper.   Maybe you can think of a better word…..    

1.  Caregiving often creeps up on you.  

It may start with dropping by your mom’s house and doing her laundry or taking your dad to a doctor’s appointment.  You find yourself doing the grocery shopping or refilling prescriptions.  Gradually, you are doing more and more.  At some point, you realize you have a commitment to take care of someone else

I can relate with my Mom aging.  Soon she won’t be driving. 

Or for others 

2.  The Sudden Event

Sometimes caregiving is triggered by a major health event, such as a stroke, heart attack, or accident.  Maybe you suddenly realize that dad’s memory lapses have become dangerous.  

The Sudden Events for me was my spouse showing me lumps in his groin area and under his arms.  We made an appointment and it all started.  Another -   It was that phone call from my parents saying that Dad’s needs an endoscopy because his CT scans showed an enlarged pancreas and spots on his liver.  Another,  it was taking my husband for knee surgery and getting the instructions of care.

Life as you know it stops, and all your energy goes to caring for your loved one.  Caregiving has become your new career, and you adjust to a new normal.  

We as caregivers are spouses, partners, adult children, parents, other relatives, siblings, aunts, nieces, nephews, in-laws, grandchildren, friends, and neighbors.    Did I miss any - if I did, drop me a DM @cathylynnvan on IG or on my business page on FB at The Caregiver Cup.  

Whatever your relationship with the person, you’re caring for, it’s important that you add the title CAREGIVER to the list of things you are.  Without identifying yourself as a...