The First Episode of The Caregiver Cup Podcast

Welcome To The Caregiver Cup Podcast.   My name is Cathy VandenHeuvel.   I’m so glad you found this podcast.  As a caregiver myself, I know how important it is to find a community that understands all the challenges of juggling all the caregiving responsibilities, how isolated you can feel,  and how stress and burnout can affect your mind and body.  But I know how rewarding and what a beautiful gift it is to take care of your loved one.

I was months into my caregiving journey where I found myself sitting in my car at a local park crying and banging on the steering wheel.  I was so tired, emotional and felt stuck.  I wanted my old life back and just wanted to run away.  I realized I didn’t take a breath and  was in auto-pilot and put my life on hold.  

I gained 20 pounds and wasn’t taking care of myself.  I would lay my head on my pillow at night and couldn’t sleep.  I would worry about my loved ones.  I gave up my daily routines at the gym, coffee with friends and added more to my busy schedule.  

People would remind me “don’t forget to take care of yourself”.   I would smile and then get angry thinking - how do I do that when the two men in my life were diagnosed with Stage 4 cancers and they needed my support.  

Fast forward 2 years.   I was managing better by adding healthy routines in my life - journaling gratitude, morning walks and trying to eat healthy.   But the caregiver stress was still there and was now chronic (meaning it was constant and has been there for a long time)   doctor diagnosed me with IBS and depression.  I gained an additional 10 pounds which added up to 30 pounds gained.  

I started reaching out to other caregivers, support groups and reading about this caregivers stress and what it does to you.   At that point, I knew I had to use my voice to share this.   In October of 2020, I started the Caregiver Cup Podcast.  You may hear episodes saying The Caregiver Wife Podcast.  I at first wanted to focus on spouses, fiances and partners but soon realized that I could share more since my caregiving journey was caring for my parents as well as my husband.  

My hope is that if I found one person, like you and you could relate and take just one thought or nugget from my podcast,  that I was helping.

 In the first year of The Caregiver Cup Podcast, I shared what I knew, where I was at in my journey and most importantly researched and practiced new habits right with the caregiver Cup Community that was forming.   

Now fast forward my 5th year of caregiving, specifically early 2022.  I was challenged even more with my spouse going through a bone marrow transplant and my Mom entering hospice care.    My anger turned to resentment.  My frustration turned to an attitude of not caring.  I felt hopeless.  I was withdrawn and avoided my friends.  I was not a nice person to be around.   No matter what I was doing physically my body wasn’t getting healthier.  My negative thoughts convinced me that nothing will ever change.   

Until….  I found my community.  There is so much magic in finding other caregivers that “get it”.  People that understand it.   I realized I isolated myself physically, emotionally and spiritually.    I really think connecting with community opened the door for me seeing the importance of the causes of my caregiver stress and caregiver burnout  and why I couldn’t find a way to release and heal.  

Today I’m continuing to work on my healthy boundaries, finding habits to live in the present and practicing self-love.    You can’t be at your best if you don’t put yourself first.   And you and I define “our best self” differently.   Now I walk to that park, and embrace that moment each day.  

I'm excited to soon celebrate my second year in The Caregiver Cup podcast helping burnout caregiver find their best self in this challenging time   If you feel exhausted, my hope is that you find your energy.   If you feel anger or resentment, my hope is you understand why and then take steps to shift your thoughts.  If you feel lonely, my hope is that you think of me as your friend.  If you feel stuck and burnt out, my hope is that you can take a breath and look for ways to rest.